This Morning...John 15:1-8

This morning, as I instantly opened my eyes I knew my heart was hardened! I now understand when Joyce Meyer says that the thoughts you think in those first 5minutes of the day have the POWER to shape your day...

As I woke up, I knew immediately there was something on my heart...something that I had to take before the Lord, but also something that I felt he already knew about so why take it to him again? I began my time with him by reading 'Starting Your Day Right by Joyce Meyer' and as he always does, smack bang on the page was a word in season about Follwing God's Lead' and trusting him in times of uncertaintity.

Before I woke, I understood that my flesh had begun to look at the circumstances in my life and how I began to feel as if I've nothing to show for my age. 24, working in Sainsbury's as an online shopper, just finished uni, applying for new jobs, hearing nothing back and looking at the direction of my life (which in the natural looks rather bleak) #fail

As I meditated on another of Joyce Meyer's daily devotionals, I was led again to 'cast my care onto the Lord' and follow my heart. I know right now that I am unable to follow my heart, because I'm sure it's full of emotion and if I followed my heart in its current state of affairs...well let's just say I would be making some very emotionally led decisions now to please my flesh which I may regret later on.

In my time with Him this morning, I poured out the heaviness of my heart meditated on scriptures and wrote in my journal. As always, writing in my journal the Lord always speaks back to me and this morning he explained the reason for this season in my life! He's maturing and making me grow as  John 15-2 states 'He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes^[a] so that it will be even more fruitful' . In this season in my life he's pruning away, and I began to think of the analogy when I see my mother pruning roses, she removes all the dead leaves and once this is done, the rose, once again, looks brand new! The removing of leaves from such a plant doesn't look nice, and some have to be tugged.

Like a rose, I have some thorns, which prick myself and others sometimes, and the Lord also appears to be removing these from me also! And I can promise you its tugging away at my flesh!

If you find yourself going through the same thing, I encourage you to sit at his feet on a daily basis! Do not let your emotions begin to dictate how your day will go...my flesh this morning looked at my life and began to have a hissy fit! It tried to make me feel sorry for myself and in all honesty, I had to remember that the Lord guides my steps and I am currently where I am now, as he has led me here and wants me here. In this season I am required to trust and understand that when I look back, it'll all make sense to me in the end.

If your like me and are in a season of uncertaintity, PUSH through it! Push through like you have never done before, sit at his feet, read his word, be obedient and DO the things He is guiding you to do and most of all ENJOY this SEASON, because just like the weather outside, seasons change. This too shall pass...don't be in a hurry and run ahead of the Lord, because 'apart from him we are nothing'. Be obedient, seek his face, seek his will and purpose for your life; trust that like a cookie shaper, He is tearing away all of those things which do not look like him, and after the fire, you will come out not only pure, but with no scratch nor burn!

Remember, He is your Daddy, he craves you, your heart and all that you are...be about his business and he will be about yours!

God bless you xx

New chapter...new life (that's what they all say! lool)

Uni is over. Finished, completed, never to return again! PRAISE. GOD!

I have to say it was one of the most testing times of my life - however in reality I thank the Lord for the lessons along the way!

Uni finished last week and in all honesty, I've seemed to have struggles to remove myself from the uni mindset...as I go about my day I'm asking myself 'Elisha, do you have coursework?' 'Any outstanding work left?' Jheeze, I need to give myself a break but when something has been your life for so long sometimes its hard to break away from it!

Through uni I was pushed to emotional and mental limits that I can say I had not faced before; let's just say University was my Golaith! It was a giant that without being able to pull out energy and strength from within, it would have defeated me! I cried, I shouted, I whaled, I wanted to give up...IN FACT at some points I even GAVE UP! Threw in the towel, threw my toys out the pram...why because it hurt so bad and I COULDN'T TAKE THE PAIN OF THE GOING THROUGH! However, now it is over I can honestly say it is well worth every single emotion...every tear and every frustration! If only I'd remembered that I already have the VICTORY through the blood of JESUS! That he never goes to battle and returns defeated! Emotions hey...those things...and this leads onto my next topic quite nicely!

SELF-PITY!

I can honestly say that because it has been a part of my life for so long (and by the way it's idolatory and a sin towards God) its become a habit!

When I first became single after being in a relationship for 6 years - the immediate emotion of fear hit me! 'What am I going to do now?' And like a baby, the Lord had to wean me away from the bossom to the bottle - from dependency to independence, and to dependence on Him! He weaned me away from self-pity, made me take responsibility for any actions that I had acted out before, any wrong ways of thinking as we are reminded that we must 'Be constantly renewed in the renewing of our minds...'

Where am I going with this...that self-pity takes a choice to move away from and pain to go through but after the process of weaning, wining and crying we come out an adult! I'm currently in the process of making a daily choice and reminding myself of Joyce Meyre's quote -

'You can be pitiful or powerful, but you cannot be both'.

I refuse to cry 'what about me anymore'...I refuse to be looked upon as that woman who is never content - I choose to be content in my season of life...as in all honesty its our flesh which we fight against daily...my flesh may want to have a pity party but as a Woman created in the image of the Most High I've no time for self-pity in my life; time is precious and it cannot be wasted! I was created as a help-meet; created for a purpose!

If only we could divide the truth from the fact -

FACT: I'm struggling right now and I FEEL like giving up!'

TRUTH: Phillipians 4:13 - I can do ALL things through CHRIST who STRENGHTENS ME'.

FACT: 'All my friends are getting married, having babies, seem to have their careers...blah, blah, blah...

TRUTH: Ecclesiates 3:1 'For EVERYTHING there is a SEASON, a time for EVERY activity under heaven!

 Ecclesiates 3:2 - ' A time to PLANT and a TIME TO HARVEST'.

I guess what I'm trying to say is be content...let the Lord do his perfect work and in your season you shall reap a harvest! Beyond your imagination...live in hope, not in self pity.

EML xx